Saw a post on Fiona and Twig yesterday that really started me thinking. The post was about the quote, "What would you do, if you knew you could not fail?".
So much of my life has been dictated by fear. In fact, for a couple of years, I was pretty much entirely agoraphobic and rarely even left my house except when I absolutely had to. As a child, I remember always feeling small and afraid. I had a terrible time making friends and would often sit by myself at lunch and play outside at recess alone. Even as I got older, when I was in college, I'd often go into the bathroom, lock myself in a stall and eat my lunch alone.
Today, as a 34 year old adult, I have to push myself to do even the most mundane things. Going to the grocery store, walking around the mall, going out to a movie or dinner with my husband, these are all things I'm too anxious and afraid to do. And of course getting a job or going back to school are out of the question. The mere thought is enough to induce a panic attack.
It's hard for me to imagine a life without having to worry about failing. It's almost dangerous to contemplate, lest I get too caught up in the fantasy and get hurt falling back to earth when reality sets back in. At the same time, I am so tired of living in constant fear of failing.
Perhaps 2011 will be the year I finally confront some of that fear and step out on a limb. I'd very much like to start my own home-based decor business. I'm told my work is quite good and have been asked to do many custom pieces. Maybe this is the year I'll get one of my dreams off the ground.
What would you do if you knew you wouldn't fail?