Today's the big day, the day I turned the ole three five. It started out well enough with dh and ds wishing me a Happy Birthday and giving me a nice card and a little MP3 player I'd been asking for. I logged online expecting there to be SOMETHING from SOMEONE and was crushed to see zip, zero, NADA anywhere. No emails, no comments on Facebook, nothing. Another check against the ole N FOO.
A little later in the day, I came back home with ds after going out to pay a bill and run a quick errand to find a message on the answering machine from my step-aunt wishing me a happy day. When I checked online, I found an email from my eye doctor, one from my chiro and another from our old mortgage company wishing me a Happy Birthday. An hour or so after that, I got a call from our new insurance agent wishing me the best on my special day. By this time, it is after 2pm and still no word from N FOO. I mean, really, is it THAT much trouble to write two words - Happy Birthday - on my Facebook wall or something? (It was around this point that good ole aunt N posted a very nice message on my FB wall wishing me happy day. At least SOMEONE in that side of the family cares.)
When I checked the mail later, I found a card from NF and NSM. It was some long, drawn out, uber-religious card (again, nothing against religion in and of itself, it's just annoying and offensive coming from such total hypocrites as NF and NSM) that contained nothing and said only, "We Miss You, NF and NSM". Really? Yeah, I can tell. NOT. Seems to me if they truly cared, even HALF as much as they'd like me to believe they do, they'd have acknowledged my hurt feelings when they were in town, offered a sincere apology and followed it up by trying not to repeat their bad behavior. Furthermore, they'd have tried to make amends instead of being only too eager to allow me to walk away and not speak to them anymore. Yeah, they care alright. Just enough to send a stupid card full of fake sentiments that they clearly don't feel and throw in a little birthday guilt trip for good measure.
FINALLY, after 5pm, I see another message on my FB wall from my other aunt (who I'm not really close to but who likes to play like the family is so close and loving) wishing me a happy day and nearly an hour after that, I get a phone call from my MIL wishing me Happy Birthday, though only AFTER she'd called and chatted with 5 year old ds for a few minutes.
When dh came home and saw I was upset, he naturally asked what was wrong and so I told him all of the above. He didn't come right out and say as much really but his general comments and tone seemed to say that he doesn't get what the big deal is. So what if no one wished me a Happy Birthday first thing today and waited until later in the day? And of course I felt like a big selfish jerk for feeling hurt, etc.
The thing is, yet again it feels like I'm bottom priority to everyone. It's not that I expect to always be in the spotlight but, geez louise, how much effort does it take to just type a two sentence email and hit send or call someone up and say, "I can't really talk right now but I just wanted to wish you a very Happy Birthday today."? Or, as I said earlier, to type "Happy Birthday" on my Facebook wall, since they're all on FB? They've all been online off and on all day yet they didn't even think to write Happy Birthday to me until almost the end of the day? And what the hell does my MIL have to do that she was so busy all day? She's retired, BIL and SIL are back and home so MIL no longer has to worry about caring for the baby and MIL has never been one to keep a clean house (it's generally picked up of stuff but, if you look up close, it's DIRTY). Aside from catering to FIL, what was so consuming that she couldn't be bothered to call earlier or shoot me a quick message on FB?
I'm just so sick of having it thrown up in my face time and time again that of all the people in my life, it's those who aren't even related to me or that I don't even truly know and have never met (like you all here or the lovely ladies over at the DoNM board) who care enough to bother themselves with saying something as small as "Hope you have a Happy Birthday!".
I get it already. No one cares (meaning in my N FOO and IL family, not including dh and ds who obviously DO care very much). I don't matter and I'm obviously not worth anyone's time. Thanks a bunch for throwing it in my face yet AGAIN. Just one more year of Happy fucking Birthday to me.