SM called earlier. Apparently she finally got around to telling me my uncle S had died. When I told her I'd already seen a message from her (estranged) sister on Facebook to my (good) half sister, SM flew into an N rage saying her sister "had no right to do that". When I mentioned that I didn't see that her sister had done anything wrong, SM said "That's not the point. It's not her place to tell you guys!" At first glance, I was a tad confused at SM's unnecessary rage. But after a bit of thinking, it suddenly became crystal clear. Can you guess the offense?
The answer is that the REAL reason SM is pissed is because her sister stole her thunder by relaying the news first. Generally, when someone calls to say someone died, THEY get all the sympathy and attention and get to be the center of attention by way of being the bearer of bad news. So when SM's sister let the cat out of the bag by expressing her condolences to my half sister for her loss, she "stole" what SM felt was rightfully HERS and THAT is the real reason she flew into a rage.
Her sister's punishment supposedly involved a scathing email. SM happened to mention, before hanging up, that she'd been wanting to send her an email but didn't have good reason and this gave her her reason. My apologies to SM's sister (not that she'll get to read this). I hate that I got her in trouble though SM surely would have found an excuse to send the scathing email sooner or later.
I get so sick of these N's and their uncalled for rages and stupid mind games and whatnot. Oh to live in a world without them! I guess we can dream......right? ;o)
About Me
- DisturbedAngel
- I am 38 years old, married to a wonderful, loving man and the proud stay-at-home mama to a beautiful little boy. I grew up with a narcissistic mother and abusive stepfather. My half sister has always been the golden child and I, the family scapegoat who can never seem to measure up. After years of bending over backward to try and have a good relationship with my half sister, I finally severed contact in March of 2009. Then, in January of 2010, I also severed all contact with my narcissistic mother. (Updated to add that as of May 2011, I've also cut ties with my narcissistic father and stepmother as well.) Currently, I am back in contact with my NM in a limited capacity. Walking away from all that toxicity was a LONG time coming but I can't believe how much better I feel because of it. This diary is intended primarily to be a log of my journey toward healing from the abuses I've endured. I hope it will also become a place where others who've been cast as the family scapegoat or who've been the victims of a narcissist's abuse can find comfort in knowing they aren't alone.
I go it right away! They are all the same and they are predictable...most of the time.
ReplyDeleteImagine a life without any real love or connection to any other human being. Maybe they lead such empty lives they have to create their own drama.
ReplyDeletePerhaps, the trick is to detach and just sit in the audience, but never participate. If we get really bored with the play we can just walk out of the theatre!
(Delurking to say) Your last bit is probably rhetorical, but: you *can* live in a world without them. It's entirely possible.
ReplyDeleteBTW, Happy Birthday! And I hope you are giving yourself a big birthday month of treats.
How typical and PETTY! Even death is just a pawn in their attention game.
ReplyDeletestay strong,
upsi