One NM's recent Today Show appearance...

Some of you may have seen the show. Others may have heard about it on the DoNM board or another related board you post at. Long story short, one NM got her 15 minutes of fame on the Today Show claiming - as I think so many of us are familiar with - that she was a loving, supportive mom and, for no reason at all (at least none known to her, or so she claims), her wretched daughter has cut her out of her life and the poor mother is left heartbroken and bewildered. The result is a long thread full of comments from both sides of the equation - DoNM's and mothers alike - with the main consensus of the other side seemingly being that we DoNM's are spoiled and selfish and ought to be ashamed of ourselves. After all, as one mother put it, THEIR generation would NEVER consider cutting their mothers out of their lives, ever!

This NM was teamed up with a therapist whose credibility really needs to be questioned, IMHO, being that he comes across as being totally supportive of this obvious NM and yet doesn't seem to see what lurks beneath that rather convincing facade. I mean, isn't it his JOB to see these things? Worst of all I think was that this poor daughter's picture was shown repeatedly on screen, as it turns out, without her permission.

Since the Today Show and the majority of the posters on their thread seem to support the side of the poor, estranged mother, I thought I'd post the daughter's point of view here on my blog. She goes by the screen name "Peacefor5" and here's what she has to say:

peacefor5
I have read every single comment on here. I have to agree with the majority of the comments on here. I always thought that I was the only one who had gone through this with a mother like the one on Today; a mother exactly like her. There are two sides to this story- the truth and hers. She is a master manipulator, but underneath that exterior of niceness is a river of evil. She knows exactly what happened and it wasn't just one thing it was years of systematic abuse, rage, hostility, alienation from family all wrapped up in a pretty package. She is riding this "doctor's" coattails for her 15 minutes. It's all about her, always has been and always will be. Many of you have already seen that in the interview. The Today show didn't contact me or ask for my permission to parade my pictures across national TV in a sick slide show while this woman narrates her "tragic" story. I am very disappointed in the Today show as it was all lies and untruths- just shows she can suck in a doctor and Meredith into her manipulations! I had to hear of this "interview" through friends yesterday. I have no doubt that she will never stop this harrassment. It has ranged from litigation (yes, she tried to sue me), showing up at my work, and now NATIONAL TV! Yesterday proved that this has never been about "our relationship". I was a pawn to her, always was and always will be as this interview showed. I can't do anything about her touring with this "doctor" and flaunting my pictures everywhere. She can keep those pictures. That's all she will get of me anymore.
#46.2 - Wed Jul 7, 2010 8:17 AM EDT

peacefor5
I would like to thank y'all for your support. It's strange to have this kind of support from people I've not met. I've thought for years (most of my life) that I was the only one to be in this situation-although growing up you just survive-you don't question...I can only say right now that this was definitely a shock yesterday and I don't think I've fully comes to terms with what happened yesterday. This isn't the first time something like this has happened definitely not on a national level (i don't think anyway). I've come to realize that she will not stop this. Every time I think it's finally "done" something else happens. As I stated before she knows...she knows exactly why. I've always been a pawn for her-a means to an end.This was totally confirmed by her interview yesterday in which she describes our relationship as completely normal and loving (I'm no expert, but I know our relationship was anything but normal) This type of behavior has gone on since I can remember (3 years old maybe). When I became a mother and saw her abuse and disturbing behavior escalate, I decided I had to make a change. I just couldn't allow my then baby to have to deal and process any of her poison. As a mom, the things that were done are just wrong-things I could never imagine putting my child through. I'm not sure at this point I've dealt with everything, probably will never understand, but I decide to move on, to realize I am not her or anything like her. I am grateful however, that through this I've found that I'm not the only one. Some people are just evil, plain and simple. They can come in pretty packages and seem completely unassuming but they are wolves. That's who she is. I have to wonder about the "doctor" though...maybe he just doesn't know her yet....I do appreciate the support and I thank you for letting me know now that I'm not the only one to have made a decision to end a relationship with an abusive, manipulative mother who hides behind deceit and uses people for her own gains. #46.7 - Wed Jul 7, 2010 7:49 PM EDT

peacefor5
Yes, I am her biological daughter. I do not consider her my mother, only in the most "scientific" terms. I read a quote once that said " Giving birth doesn't make you a mother just like owning a piano makes you a pianist"I apologize for the confusion in the earlier post-I'm not a writer. She is toxic as I said earlier. As for "beachlover" I don't know what "His plan" is for me but I know He is in control. What I also know is that He was there during those dark dark times growing up when I was completely alone. I know He carried me through that. He shielded me from her evil influence. I am thankful for that everyday. I'm sure you mean well, but you have no idea who Debby really is and I'm not talking about things she's done but who she truly IS. Her heart is dark. This whole thing, the interview...etc has never been about "our relationship". It's about her....I can't change that and have no desire to. I know what she's capable of and you don't. That is scary. After this nationally televised fiasco, I have no idea what she'll do next. But I have no doubt she won't stop. Years ago I would have been afraid of her and hid in the corner, but not anymore. She doesn't have control over me anymore. I am free of her and that's what makes her come undone. She can't hurt me. Just FYI, if she ever sees these posts here somewhere , it's really going to tick her off that in most of them she's NOT being seen as a victim and most of these people saw right through her!Trust me...she won't be happy! As far as this psychologist goes, he really should do a background check before he picks someone to promote his books. And that's all this was, a book promotion-an exploitation of me/pictures of my youth- a means to an end- Debby will ride this one till it over. She's getting her 15min and I was her pawn-once again.
#46.10 - Wed Jul 7, 2010 10:41 PM EDT

peacefor5
No one asked for permission to use images of me. I guess big NBC doesn't have to. Luckily my children don't watch the Today show! I wasn't watching either but heard about it from a friend who was...
#61.1 - Wed Jul 7, 2010 7:54 PM EDT